Brady's Pilgrimage

"MEN CARE"

2010-04-23T08:20:00.000-07:00

Wow, its been 4 and 1/2 months since my last post a few minutes before new years, 2010. Well, a lot has happened since then… I've moved back home to Lawrence, KS in with my brother Troy on family land that my dad owns, where our grandparents used to live. We've got 10 acres here that we are stewarding for the time being, and from my perspective, doing a damn fine job at that. After a last minute ski trip to colorado and road trip to Oregon with my good friend Colin Tisdale at the beginning of January, I took the train to BC to see my girlfriend Andrea. It was an amazing wild week in Vancouver, Salt Spring Island, Victoria and the Washington Coast, but I was abel to wring out that last little desire to travel before settling down for the growing season here in Kansas. So back in Lawrence in mid January I hit the ground running, planning for spring, buying materials, starting seeds, inviting friends to come help and intern, building our team for Karlin Family Farms! Luckily we struck gold recruiting my good buddy Ashton Martin, who came on board at the beginning of February while Troy was in Europe. Our first big projects, after ordering $1000 in open pollinated vegetable, herb and flower seeds from Baker Creek (rareseeds.com) , was to "break ground" on our 10,000 sq. ft. Market garden addition and to design and build a greenhouse off our south facing garage. We had our first work party March 6th with shining success, we were able to sheet mulch 5,000 sq. ft. and create 10 new 40" x 50' beds in a flash; with the help of a dozen friends, a few pizzas and a cold keg of PBR of course. Our greenhouse started construction in mid-march and was operational by the 1st of April, although it already seemed warm enough by then to do without, i'm sure it will come in handy for future years. Next we had another 5,000 sq. ft section tilled by our friend Darren and his tractor, he and Mike also helped us develop 1000 ft of swale for our 3-tiered "food forest" and wildlife corridor.

Latest happenings have included going to the Earth Day fair in south park, transplanting over 500 baby seedlings into the ground and direct seeding another 1000, with 4,000 still yet to transplant! We've planted over 200 fruit/nut trees and shrubs along our swales. We are finishing construction of an 8' tall deer, rabbit, gopher fence around the south gardens. We are planing a work party this sunday to install our mandala garden on the north side of the house and also build a gigantic biodynamic compost pile. We are still hoping to get a bee hive going, build a cob oven, outdoor shower and composting toilet. Eventually we want to have chickens, ducks, goats, sheep, pigs and cows as well, not too mention solar thermal/ electric, greywater catchment and the list goes on and on and on and on and on and on>.>>>>>>.>>>.>>>.>>>.

If you want to visit the farm or hear more, check us at on our Facebook group "Karlin Family Farms" or email me at bradykarlin@gmail.com Thank you for your continued support!

In other news, I recently staffed a New Warrior Training Adventure (my 2nd staffing, with 1 MOS, and 1 Boys to Men) with my brother Troy and our oldest brother Brent went through the weekend for his initiation. It was an inspiring, intense, heart opening weekend for myself, I learned, I struggled, I grew. On Sunday morning I had to write down my thoughts, feelings and reactions. This is what came through>>..

"MEN CARE"

As Men we Fuck Up A Lot, most of our lives we spend controlled by our anger, fear and shame. Asleep, unconscious, dominated by our shadows. It is time to "WAKE THE FUCK UP!"

Grab your brother's arm and help him stand, in this circle of men where we express our feelings, own our judgements, openly supported in this container of sweat, flesh, strong supple muscles of youth, scarred brittle bones of age. ALL IS WELCOME HERE, we do not care about appearance, WE CARE ABOUT YOU; your little boy's deepest needs, long lost dreams, mature wisdom, fiery passion, speak your truth, show your heart, LIGHT US UP! We will be here when you return from your hero's journey to nurture, embrace you in our masculine love. There is nothing funny or crazy about what we do, though we do have fun and plenty of loose screws. I come because I want to, this time we share is SACRED, having you men in my life means A LOT. It makes the difference between joy and despair, isolation and community. This tribe of Kings, Warriors, Magicians and Lovers are my new brothers. My choice, my word, my intention, creates my world. A beautiful future is beckoning us like the sunrise, let us wear our courage as a cape, claim our noble crown, and ride as knights in shining armor on the winds of change….We are the GROWN ASS MEN we've been waiting for! are you awake?……..Are You Awake??………. . ARE YOU AWAKE???

A Baby in an Igloo...

2009-12-31T21:29:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I feel like a baby in an igloo, wondering where I am, in such a foreign territory, cold, drunk, speachless. But my hopes are grand for this new year of two thousand ten. My dreams are even bigger, I don't know where to start, overwhelmed by the pressure to succeed in supporting my lifestyle doing exactly what i want to do and what i think the earth would want me too. I keep telling myself if money and circumstance weren't an issue, i'd be doing exactly what i am.

Preparing a magical concoction of love to pour into the practical mold manifest in lawrence, kansas of all places, The Karlin Family Farm, a shining example local, beyond organic, of learning and demonstration permaculture farm beyond farm, a place to live, to work, to become fulfilled with duty, to provide for ones family, to invest in natural capital, to live self sufficiently, to grow one's food, to share the surplus with one's community. To prove there is another way to do things that there is a beautiful future ahead of us.

This is what I yearn to do and i need your help, support, love, kindness. My new year's resolution is to do one kind thing for someone else during my day, everyday. To check one thing of my list of "to do's" and to do one good thing that feeds my soul, that makes me smile! I hope you do the same, I love you as I love myself, help me find the courage to face all fears and blaze a new trail...

Permies and Burners oh MY!

2009-09-11T17:35:00.000-07:00

Onward through the fog I arrived at Quail Springs as one of six mentors for the first ever Sustainable Vocations program: 3 weeks, 15 participants (14-23 y/o), one 72 hour Permaculture Design Certification, 10 guest speakers, 4 Field Trips, 56 awesome home cooked meals! Wow, what an experience, it was a true treat indeed to be a part of this wonderful and exciting learning parade... Warren Brush and all of the residents of Quail Springs are warm, welcoming and full of knowledge, story and rich experiences. I give thanks to all that made this training happen, and I am happy to say I now have my very own PDC! I would like to share some words of praise to all of my mentors past and present, that fell into my journal during those awesome days!

"Permaculture Praise" 8/18/09

My heart cries in gratitude at the beauty of your soul's expression
my dry lips thirst for your stories of the good ole days
our ancestors smile when you sing soft melodies of folk, birds stop to listen,
my inner child dances at the chance to fit in and be a kid again.
In your company I am help in the palm on an angel, safe, secure, seen.
Though mistakes are made, lessons let learn, encouragement rides on the winds of your praise and acknowledgment of me.
Just one quarky bee drunk on the honey of life, stumbling and fumbling from tree to tree always finding my way back home with pockets full of pollen, inspiration to feed and nurture my family. A heart saturated in grief, I embrace their familiar warmth yearning to connect in a different way.

I am tired, lost, broken, let the wholeness of my essence be felt not shooken.
I am afraid of disappearing without ever fully living or remembering why I came here and what gifts I am meant to give.
So I walk barefoot, beat up and bloodied picking up pieces in patterns not yet understood,
knowing that miracles are brewing, fairies working overtime, the spirit of the earth is calling.
I strain my ears to hear her words of wisdom.
Hopeful and certain of nothing I trudge forward through the fog in mind letting go of beliefs that don't serve.
Looking down at footsteps of past noticing scattered grains of golden sand that lie shimmering in my wake. Pebbles of knowledge, experience, perfect, unique.
Admiring the path that I chose, trail of rainbows, circles blessed to sit in amongst masters and mentors, in between goddesses and kings.

I notice you, the way you move with ease and speak with grace, we laugh a lot, have loads of fun, but most important always get the job done.
Work doesn't feel so hard when you are near, distracted by the humility of your gentle nature.
It's in your blood , dirt in your clothes, crease of your hat, your care for all and always share fair.
Sometimes I get it, at times forget it, daze off into dreams deferred, what am I waiting for?
The time is here, message clear, "go....fly.....buzz you bizzy bee, leave the hive for sweeter honey cross horizons, boundaries, limits.

Keep searching for paradise till your in it. Don't give up and regret, destiny will always be calling, opportunity knocking to let you in on another secret.
Everything's alright enjoy the ride, relax your grip, if you hold on too tight you'll never feel true ecstasy or bliss.
It only takes you kiss to turn a toad to a prince, charming and confident I survey this kingdom, with unconditional compassion. Fierce, brave, surfing the wave of passion, excited to hit the shore and see what happens. As the tide ebbs and flows I perch on the mountain top like sage, shaman, prophet, making offerings, prayin, smilin, breathin...

"Wear your vision on your sleeve, reveal yourself like an open book, engage the world with moments of creativity and spontaneous joy. Slow down, watch the sun rise and set, moon wax and wain, notice the abundance of a desert, see the masterpiece within a pile of junk. Waste equals food and there's no price to pay for resourceful solutions, one million blocks of clay can build a village, our thoughts eliminate pollution. As the universe revolves lets stop trippin on where it started, realize we are the center, decide where we're headin! Lets make magic daily, earn a fortune while regenerating this ecosystem. Wealth and surplus are nutrients for dreams to blossom. In this communal world garden the future is upon us like a blanket on a cold night, let us learn to die to be reborn in light, as we spread and sink our light in the earth, watch springs of bounty come bursting forth out of every crack and crevice, a contagious respect for all life, stepping with our best foot first, bringing the best versions of ourselves out to play and shine. We have all the time to make things right, stop, rewind, pause the tape, a permanent culture is an idea ideal, it's possible if we pursue it. Lets jump right through this hoop together, one heart, one mind, one helluva party! Long life, honey in the Heart, thirteen thank yous....

After the course I headed north hitching to the Bay area then east to Yosemite for a friends wedding. I got excepted for a volunteer position to help clean up burning man in exchange for a FREE ticket, I jumped at the opportunity and headed straight for Black Rock City, round 2!
The road from Yosemite to HWY 395 was closed due to fire so I had to hike the 12 miles up and out of the valley up to Toulumne, with the 4500 ft elevation gain and a 40+ lb pack, it wasn't easy but I made it and got great rides all the way to Tahoe on Tuesday night. Got to visit some good friends and kept on truckin the next day arriving in BRC wednesday afternoon! This burn was a much better experience than my first. I got to stay with a great crew including my friend "Darko" at the Burning Roadshow Camp. The Cool Bus was in true burning fashion, I tried my best constructing a "Captain Funby" cape first thing!,

Ahh, the ups, downs, surprises and smiles were abound, pushing all boundaries physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. I had no plans, no schedule, no expectations and that is the way I prefer it a b-man. The theme was Evolution, very cool... I ran into some Colorado friends amongst others, spent the mornings at camp, afternoons out and about, decadent diners at camp and nights out on la playa! Full of dancing in geodesic domes, drunken bike rides to Buddha bunnies and beyond, art car hoppin, and of course many giant fires! Saturday was hell, dust storms all day, until "5 minutes till Burn" came over the radio.... we hurried onward through the dust and made it in perfect time to see the fire dancer parade and the crown of thorns and man ignite in a great ball of fire. Sunday's Temple burn was truly amazing, nearly silent, a huge wave of grief and release washed over the crowd as our loved ones remembered and our prayers were sent to the heavens!

Rainbow Abound; Sedona warms my Heart :)

2009-07-11T10:32:00.000-07:00

My time at the Tree of Life was complete at the end of April, my mom arrived to escort me home with my brand new bike- cycle. Leaving a lifestyle extreme, serene, beautiful light and challenging, I yearned to explore more, this time East of St. Louis and Kentucky to Appalachia and the District of our Nations capital. Back home in time to staff a warrior's initiation weekend with my brother Troy, then a brief visit with family and friends and off to ATX (austin) on an old school bus to Nashville for Cosmic Clearance via Little Rock. The medicine moves me and Shpongle grooves me, I'm off to Knoxville, then Asheville with Rusty Elaine Stevie, skateboards, rock gyms and "Chesber" our pet frisbee. The ride starts at Earthave as I reunite like lost lovers with Ryan and Mandy, we meditate, connect, and share our joy over diner with friends. Tours and tantrums, the wheels turn beneath our feet as our legs burn and storms roll in. North on the Blue Ridge Parkway, we visit Turtle Island with Eustace Conway and friends, Boone for a warmshowers stay, then to Shanon Farms, Woodfolk House, Twin Oaks and Chrysalis. DC for the Weekend and after many celebrations, and goodbyes our paths split again, and I hopped a Craigslist Ride share back to Asheville then to Bonnoaroo where miracles took me backstage and great music did not stop. Out of cash with $6 in my front pocket and a flat tire, I limp into the Farm in a station wagon, just in time for an evening with David Rovic and Cindy Shehan, good people, and good music. Work work work, play play play, and the mary go round spins day after day. From the farm to Nashville and Rainbow outside Sante Fe, my first National! Super excited, with a world of dreams at my fingers tips a giant loving and dysfunctional family! "Lovin You Guys!" From council to aucoustic dance parties, midnight pizza, pancakes and everpresent coffee. It's always morning to someone, a forest that doesn't sleep, diner-drum circles, angel walks and Prayers for peace. Cold rain, mud fights, chocolate treats. Onward with Troy to Sedona town, we took the longest, most windy path we could find, but made it in perfect time.

An Earth Sky workshop with Drunvalo set the stage to dive right in, to our hearts that is. Of course I was scared and scarred, disbelieving and sceptical. But all in all, I made it through, my connection with spirit feels renewed and strong, vast and timeless. Sedona's power inspires me to write, hug and boogie. From here I'm not sure where? If you see me on the road pick me up, join this Rainbow Trail of Living Light, could be the most interesting ride you've ever known!

2009-05-05T10:52:00.000-07:00

"Why Do I Run?" 4/10/2009

Why do I run, from Truth, Love, Now? I ask and ask and ask,
but do I listen for answers or leave premature?
I say "Give me Health, Happiness, Peace", but choose to bury my feelings, fear, and grief by eating, eating, eating unconsciously consuming the fist that feeds, choking myself with worry, self pity and doubt. I know so little about so much, when is enough enough?
Put down the book, take the headphones out, turn off the TV, start living, day by day, choice by choice, breath by breath. It takes a warrior to stop fighting and surrender, sit, still, silent, listen, learn, sacrifice simple empty pleasures for deep lasting fulfillment, purpose and joy.

Enter the Kingdom of Heaven , the doors are wide open, Love comes from within and is endless, trust your heart and see your beauty beyond your body, stand strong to your words, keep actions focused with intent. Building a castle starts brick by brick, enjoy the movements as they will last a lifetime and may never seem complete. The mountain may appear steep like a pyramid seems empty, but trust step by step and reach the top with little effort, let spirit elevate and guide go along for the ride no need to drive this vehicle knows more than you or I, with intuitive wisdom as vast as the ocean, we have all the pieces needed to frame our puzzle like a painting.

Problems like pretzels that twist and bend us blending together our faults and perfections.
The reflection of a rainbow in a oily puddle, a paradox and parody apparently wrapped in plastic and cardboard, a parrot in a cage watching the rain forest on DVD, laughing hysterically mocking grandma rocking nervously in her chair waiting for the children to get home from school. Smother us in kisses, spoil us with sweets, let us sweat as we play and fall asleep with sand in our sheets. I clean the dirt off my feet and comb my hair appearing pretty and neat brush my teeth and smile, starring eye to eye with myself, blinking blessings and prayers without shedding a tear, perking my ears as I blow my nose, its been raining for years and its time to Bloom. Spring is in the Air, Beauty in the Moon, Summer Sun Shines on the horizon illuminating the day. Stretch, dance, sing, that's all I have to say....

Spring is Here, Heading out East!

2009-05-05T08:58:00.000-07:00

Wow, one more year has come and gone, I am 23 years young, preparing for a journey out East to North Carolina and Virginia, to join friends Ryan and Mandy from the Within Reach Movie Project. They have been biking from Northern California since last April and are creating a documentary film about Sustainable and Intentional Communities all over the states, their goals are to visit over 100 communities and bike over 12,000 miles! I will ride with them for 1 month, 1,000 miles from Asheville, NC to Washington D.C. and back to Summertown, Tennessee, visiting 3 beautiful and amazing intentional communities, Earth Haven, Twin Oaks and The Farm. I am super excited having never been to the East Coast, participated in a multi-day bike tour, or feature film project.

I recently left the Tree of Life Rejuvenation Centre in Patagonia, Arizona, a Raw Vegan Spiritual Health Retreat and Community after working as Garden Assistant for 3 months. I learned a lot about myself (eating from pleasure and emotion, struggling to meditate, stretch, breathe fully and surrender to the desert). Also about nutrition, gardening and greenhouses while staying active outdoors and in the larger communities of Tucson, involving myself in the Mankind Project, Boys to Men, Acroyoga and lots of awesome hiking and climbing!

Since my last post in April of 08' I finished my 6 month garden internship at the Solar Living Institute in Hopland, California, enjoyed many adventures Earthday @ Iron Horse Winnery in Sonoma County, Memorial Day weekend with Alex in Yosemite, Harmony Festival, Yosemite 4th Of July with Lauren, Skylar, Hassan and Kristen, Reggae on the River with Dave and Marcelo on our way up to Dave's Land, Mt. Shasta and Ashland, Oregon, Santa Cruz with Marcelo, Rebecca, Skylar, Lauren, and ofcourse Solfest!

After the internship I moved in with Jini and family, learning tough lessons by "showing off to get attention, being lazy, loud and messy. " I worked with the Dr. Vapor crew: Ben, Chantal, Cliff, and OSHO, at Power to the Peacefull and Earthdance. Flew back to Lawrence to rode down to Eureka Springs, Arkansas with Troy to help create the Coalessence Festival, then back to Cali, road trip LA, Mammoth Lakes (hot springs), Yosemite, Santa Cruz, back to Mendo with friends, going through my New Warrior Training Adventure with Shankara, bought a VW van and started another roadtrip south to LA with Hassan, meeting up with Troy and Rebecca then Troy and I headed East through, J-Tree, Flagstaff, Sedona, Patagonia, Truth of Consequences, NM, Austin, Tx, back to Lawrence for X-mas. The van had a nervous meltdown, but we managed to rent a car day after christmas and drive to mexico with Walt, Colin and Ben just like old times staying at Homero's and climbing large in El Potrero Chico. For the New Year we drank mas cervesas and rode a mechanical bull with small sticks of explosives erupting under our feet as we danced to a mexican dj underneath the stars. Colin, Walt and I headed back to Larry-town where I thought I would get rest and a break from the rush of travels. However, Troy wakes me up at 3am to go skiing in Colorado on his expense, 3 hrs later on our way to Breckenridge with Randy, Skiied and Rode Breck, then Copper with Mom and Mike, I split and hitched up to Winter Park with Kristen, Ft. Collins, Denver with Lindsay, Ian, Sean, Hope and Mike, got the job offer at the Tree of Life and got a rideshare down to Sedona, the hitched the rest of the way to Patagonia.

Last week Mom picked me up in P-town, we drove up to Sedona for the closing ceremony of Return of the Ancestors with 120 elders from around the globe, them arrived in Lawrence Wednesday night, saw friends Lindsay, Walt and Clayton. Troy and I left to Staff the NWTA in Kansas City and were there untill Sunday evening, saw Dad and Terry and Tim, rested yesterday going to hear Bob Stevens present on conscious language. I have a ride down to Austin, Tx then Nashville and arriving in Asheville N.C. on Sunday to start yet another magical chapter in this book of Life.

Where Is My Mind? Wheere is-myy Mind?

2008-04-20T23:48:00.000-07:00

Its been nearly two and a half months since my last post, i've taken some extra time to let my new environment settle within amongst the communal chatter, broken routines and last goodbye's to familiar family.

In short, the new internship at the Solar Living Institute in Hopland, CA is going well, I reccomend everyone that can or is into sustainability come visit!, I've been learning a lot in the garden about growing my own food from seed to harvest, a great experience mostly trial and error, very self motivated but fulfilling work. Pete the Intern and Garden manager is great, very conscious, organized and hardworking, sometime to a fault but all in all good company and jolly! The community of interns is here and there, all of us coming from different backgrounds and interests which makes it difficult at times and fun at others. We recently moved outside into tents so no longer are sleepy on top of one and other, but having tents within reaching distance provides little privacy for fooling around..., anywho, we'll cross that bridge when we get there... The situation is a little slanted as far as the dating game goes with 6 guys and 2 gals, safe to say there's a surplus of testosterone. The institute is nice though, there always loads happening on and off site, with workshops, community events and field trips. The funnest part has been checking out other cool sites in the area, some intentional communities, CSA's, and research gardens, not to mention the Biodynamic Conference rocked my socks off!

Other than that i'm trying to hold my self together physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally, feeling a lack of deep connection to the Earth, Tribe, Family and Friends but realizing all is in due time, motivation ebbs and flows sometimes floods i try to direct it without building dams, reaching out without over extending myself is of high reguard, this last few days has been a true test and trip realizing the hard truths of life and death, saying Goodbye to my Grandpa Felix who's dying at the age of 80, he lived a good life and i'm happy to wish him well into the afterlife, trying hard not to let other's emotions get the best of me, while trying not to close the door on my own. Before the brief phone call ended he said "I hope
you have a great life... I'll see you on the otherside", i said " yeah Grandpa, you have a lot to look forward too, take care, i love you, i'll see you there too..." I think death should be as beautiful and celebrated as birth and although these thoughts are unconventional to the western mind, i think Grandpa would say so too. I thought a lot about this the other day, how i will keep his spirit alive when Felix is gone, i think i would like to plant a garden, or tend to the one that he used to keep when i was young. I got a place in mind in Lawrence, Kansas on the corner of KASOLD RD where few cows once roamed, where i spent my early years playing wiffle ball and chasing cousins, stuffing myself silly with grandpa and grandma's amazing food, and embracing familiar faces. All is not lost, memories remain and future ones wait to be created by in my grandfather's name i would like to dedicate some time to make his home my home and his garden my garden and to take care of the earth, be kind to visitors, work hard and share the surplus, because us Karlin's are hearty folk, here for the greater good to look for solutions not problems, to greet our neighbors and lend a hand when needed, I am proud of this name and proud of my history from Lawrence to Hayes to Russia and Germany, my ancestors fought hard to give me this wonderful opportunity at life and i will spend it wisely with all my heart and wit and charming personality, to be free, happy and grateful, that is all..... "I love you Grandpa and may you always come to visit"

For the Enlightenment of All Beings!

2008-02-08T07:29:00.001-08:00

The New Year is upon me like a blanket, it comforts and surrounds me, makes me feel warm and happy about what is to come. The month of January was quite a trip, literally, my older brother Troy and I were determined to take a road trip together to explore the west, our human potential, and as possible Vision Quest. I personally was in search of fulfilling work and community, opportunities to learn and progressive projects to contribute to. Troy needed a break from work, I know that owning your own business can consume you, as it did with him, he was looking to expand his horizons, get centered and grounded looking for opportunity and vision to guide his future and the future of the company. With one day before our schedule departure I got my tags renewed on my car, insurance and picked it up from my Dad's where it had been siting in a garage for nearly a year, "I hope it runs?" Driving it back to Lawrence i realized something was wrong and needed to be fixed, luckily we know a sweet and efficient mechanic who doesn't mind working on Sunday with an incentive a some good beer. So 3oo dollars and a few hours later we were on our way, pushing into the sunset towards Colorado at 80 miles an hour!

We went skiing, saw friends, hiked, meditated daily, played lots of frisbee golf and eventually drank, watched sports and smoked pot. Not exactly off to the holistic start of the New Year I was intending, but exciting none the less. We rode with Clayton in Breckenridge, stayed at Mom's in Pagosa, slept at a friends in Santa Fe, meditated on the vortexes of Sedona, hung out with Eddie in Scottsdale, climbed in Joshua Tree, surfed in Santa Cruz, picked up Brent in Berkely, circled up with Hassan in Sebastapol, checked out the Solar Living Institute in Hopland, skied with Joel and ate lunch with Sara in Lake Tahoe, camped out in the snow of Mt. Shasta, went bouldering with Colin in Bend, played Frolf with Andy, Danced to the Alpaca Band w/ Dan and Rae, kicked it with Benji all in the rainy city of Portland, got stuck in a 3 hrs traffic jam on the way to Salt Lake City, had a 40hr epic drive back to Pagosa, where we skied, boarded, soaked our bones with Mom, Dan, Demitree and the Fam. and after the Superbowl in Southfork Mom, Dan and Troy drove back to Lawrence, and I up to Breck to see Clayton again, because the pass was closed indefinitely and i'm snowed in again! Wow, yes, yes Januaray was a trip and Febuary has proved action packed as well but more holistic for sure!

I'm on the Fifth day of the Master Cleanse fast, where i've been drinking a "spicy lemonade" concoction, meditating for about an hour a day, doing my "Sun Salutations" yoga practice and reading loads. At the moment I'm partially through about a half a dozen books, reading the Ancient Secret of the Flower of Life Vol 1., the Earth Users Guide to Permaculture, Scott Nearing's the Making of a Radical, Deepak Chopra's Book of Secrets, and just picked up Tom Brown Jr's The Quest which is absolutely fascinating! among reading intro's to about a half dozen more...

Yesterday I got home from Ice Climbing with Clayton and his friend Matt, I was pretty beat but read a few chapters in the Quest and had quite a breakthrough. the book is about TBJr's childhood from the ages 7-17 where he was taught by a great Native American elder, Grandpa Stalking Wolf with his boyhood friend Rick. Grandpa was telling them of the Four Big Prophecies of the destruction of Man and Grandpa is usually always right. Well two of those prophecies have already come to be and he says we only have time between now and the Third to make things right, by the Healing of Mother Earth and the Enlightenment of Man. Grandpa says:

"if a person is attuned to the world of the spirit, the world of vision, and working for things beyond his/herself, then the path and time to act becomes clear. Until then, allow the spirit of the Earth and the Creator to teach, and the Vision Quest to guide, and all else will become Reality" "Once the learning process of the spirit is over, however, (you) must make frequent journeys to into the world of Man to share that which is taught by the purity of the wilderness... All the Great Prophets and Holy Men have come from the Wilderness, for Wilderness is where their spiritual fires were born" pgs. 29 &84

After reading these pages I intuitively set the book down and started a meditation, first silent then using the sounds of Ahh, Omm, and the Sacred Vowels E, A, AH, O,U i put a call out to my ancestors, the spirit of the Earth and my Divine Self for the guidance and wisdom to live in service for the Healing of the Earth and Enlightenment of all Beings. Living in the moment and totally improvised this was one of the most powerful meditations i've ever had, after about 50 minutes I opened my eyes and the power of the apartment was out!, coincidence, who knows? A sign from the Universe, maybe? Anyways I wrote down the following statement in my journal and would like to share it.

"I choose to live a selfless life, powered and protected by love and spirit for the Enlightenment of all Beings and the healing of Mother Earth, Father Sky and the Divine Self. I am only part of the 'spirit-that-moves-in-all-things'. Great Spirit, Please Lead Me, Guide Me, Direct and Protect Me, I am in Service for the Greatest Good of All"

Its these moments that i feel complete, whole and in harmony with the universe, its then when i jump back on the track i was born to live! Thank You all, you are beautiful creatures made of Light, Love and Peace!

A Very Happy, Healthy and Peaceful New Year!

2007-12-31T16:21:00.000-08:00

To utilize this change in our calendar, season, and lunar energies I am clearing and purifying my mind, heart, and spirit and preparing for a new day filled with Light, Love and Laughter! This year my new year resolution is partially an inward one to detoxify, clarify and focus my intentions through meditation, yoga, travel and work, and also to connect deeply to the earth, sun, universe and my own higher self and heart spirit. I've just learned a new Mer-ka-ba meditation technique to assist me on my journey to higher consciousness. I am very excited, optimistic and hopeful for 2008. I give my love and gratitude to all of my teachers past, present and future who have helped me to this point and will guide me along my path to live sustainably, self-sufficiently and successfully wherever I choose to go, live and play! I honor my own desire, will and courage to confront my fears and dissolve them with love to help humanity heal, transform and grow into the Beautiful Future ahead! I hope all of you are able to make personal commitments to healing yourselves and mother earth and spreading light, awareness and truth here and far! I honor you, accept you and encourage you to empower yourself and breathe deep :)

Am I Still in Kansas Toto?

2007-11-26T21:06:00.000-08:00

Yes, Yes I do believe so, conflicted, confused and slightly amused, I sit at my computer and peck on hollow keys staring at a screen of mystery drawing my mind in like a fisherman. "I'm OLD GREG", lol, you tube that shit its funny and twisted, but life back in Kansas has me tied up in emotions, habits and fears. Searching for freedom and expression behind each corner, sometimes finding myself Sweating My Prayers out in a room full of beautiful people, dancing like a drunken hooligan but completely sober.

On my way back here from across seas, space and time, I was not sure what I would find or even what I was looking for. Opportunity, Love, Connection, Freedom, and encouragement were probably on my subconscious list among others and what I've found is challenge, concern and questions. These are good for me and society and necessary for growth, real problems, real people. I think this is the creative friction that Andrew Cohen writes about as important in the evolution of consciousness which I seek intensely. These last 4 months in the US have shaken, disturbed, even saddened me, but its nothing that I can't rise above, transform, and direct for the benefit of all. Because I am a truth seeker, a peaceful warrior, and active member of the community working for the greater good, I chose to step over and through these obstacles in my mind and my personal reality. I chose to create a reality that I can honor, respect and enjoy. So I keep searching for inspiration, balance, understanding, enlightenment, health, happiness and abundance in my life. I am driven from the light within my being, my heart, my spirit and am in communion with the earth, sky and infinite source of the universe.

I work on manifesting these qualities, experiences, and opportunities into my life so that I can dwell in unlimited peace, joy, and satisfaction. I keep asking myself what I'm doing here or there, what is my purpose or duty, and what I have to offer this community. And the more I think about it the more I realize my presence is what I offer, my being, body, mind and time. As long as i continue to care for myself through exercise, nutrition and rest, I will continue rising to the challenge and opportunity that the day provides. I will honor the 4 agreements, 1. Be Impeccable with your word! 2. Don't take things personally 3. Don't make assumptions 4. Always try your Best! The rest will fall in its place making history out of thoughts and actions, the movement of light is a beautiful thing:)

Conversations With Friends!

2007-11-17T08:39:00.000-08:00

So, I've been telling my friends about some inspiring films, books, and people I've come across on this journey, in hopes of giving them a different perspective then they're used to, this is a responce from one friend: creative friction? maybe...

"I have to say that I laughed out loud when they talked about the Indians not seeing the ships, which is of course, complete nonsense. There is no basis, reason or evidence to believe anything presented in the film, which is convenient because its hard to get anything out of it because of the way it is edited. Because you recommend it so much, I had to let you know that I really hope you are not basing any of your views on the information provided in the movie because it is a horrible source. Also, in my opinion you are doing people a disservice by recommending it because it is sooooooo corny and bad! Man, it was a fight to sit through the freakin thing! Had to speak out on that one, but that's about it! =) Talk to you later."

Here is my Responce...

"right on dude, i honor your opinions and am glad you did some
research, the reason i reccomend people movies like this is to get
them to think, question, and fuckin wake up man!, i see so many people
walking like zombies, toataly unispired, disempowered and depressed!
this sucks, cancer, disease, polution, consumption, religion, are all
distroying our world, ourselves, most people know the world is toataly
fucked but don't know how to help "unfuck" it. Bottom line this movie
empowers people to take action into there own hands and "create" the
world they want to live in actively and reactively. I watched, talked
to and read countless perspectives on "laws of the universe" which is
all quantum physics is, i'm talkin about reading books from many
different cultures, classes, time periods, and as far as i know
reputable, considering i haven't heard anything disclaiming their
views, but realizing they are human, not perfect, its about
perspective and understanding for me not about knowledge, this is why
a try my best to get a variety of sources from each angle, Books like,
Ageless Body, Timeless Mind by Deepak Chopra, Sleeping Prophet of
Edgar Casey, Waiting to Love by David Deida,Talking Jaquar by Martin
Pretchel, The Ancient Secrets of the Flower of Life & Living in the
Heart by Drunvalo Melchezedic, Falling Cedars by Vladimir Migre, Food
of the Gods by Terrance Mekenna, The World Peace Diet by Will Tutle,
Peace in Every Step by Thich Nhat Hahn, Manhood by Stephen
Rect...Movies like Zeitgeist, One Giant Leap, The New Biology,
EndGame, Go Further, Inspiration w/ Wayne Dyer, I know I'm not Alone,
Scared Sacred, Suzuki Speaks, Global Swindle, ect....

I'm just trying to help widen people perspectives, work in harmony
with the universe, peacefully and productively, I learn from those who
inspire me, through reading or watching movies, but mostly people that
i have met and talked to face to face, because i relate to these
people, they live admirable lives unlike most of the people i know
here, and that is what i aspired to do, i am leaving mediocrity
behind, i'm stiriving to expand and evolve my consciousness, and live
through love, from the heart! I want balance in my life of the male
and female energies and believe that in most societies of the world
are almost completely male dominated, energetically! they are totally
disconnected to their femine power,

you can doubt it, defend it, argue about it, all i ask you to do brad
is go after what inspires you, fills you with love and happiness, if
this isn't it, fine, but don't stop educating yourself, through
experience, feel it, touch it, taste it, hear it, smell it, don't just
read it dude, talk to real people!,

I love you man, and I honor and respect who you are, keep up the good
work, (are we working for the same things here? the Greater Good? to
save the planet? is there room for everything that is helping us Wake
Up, and Evolve!)

Peace, and Easy Cheese,"

"I Have a Dream"

2007-11-01T00:58:00.000-07:00

I have a dream to live Sustainably, in harmony with the Earth, in a community of loving friends and families, having a deep, open, honest and intimate relationship with a or multiple companions. I will live everyday consciously from the beginning with holistic exercise, meditation and nutrition. I will grow my own food and resources, help educate the communities around not only be example but by vocation, duty! I will learn to sail and fly freely without pollution, ride and drive an electric bike or van, build a home of natural and recycled materials. I will create and support loving and open relationships with my immediate family and friends, I will walk proud and confident, speak with determination but softness, staying humble and balanced, find honorable causes to be involved in for work and volunteer. I have a dream to finish my university education while creating something that lasts, to help organize and network the unlimited resources in the world today. I wish to question authority and protest with non-violent direct action. I will make Love and own it, lead with an inspired and compassionate heart, jump on opportunities as they arise. I will practice self control, but will not ignore the Globalized world, I will take responsibility for myself and humanity, fighting corruption and greed by planting seeds of love and generosity, unconditional sharing and acceptance. I have a dream to give without receiving, to live be my morals and virtues, a dream of justice and peace without Hunger, poverty or dis-ease. That humanity live together as one entity not separate. To be without feeling guilt, shame, fear or embarrassment. I will live with great self respect, self esteem and self love. I am Beauty and that will radiate from me, I will be a revolutionary, I will be Ghandi, I will be Jesus, and may their loving energy shine through me, the ways of success, the way on the Uni-verse!!

Note to Self...

2007-11-01T00:41:00.000-07:00

Note to Self... Don't forget to Breathe

Aahhhh...remember, everything will be okay. Stay positive, keep smilin and float. Breathe into the beauty that surrounds you, feel your body and its presence on the earth. This is Real to me. I am living my dreams, walking through invisible boundaries and setting myself free. I am all and All is me. Let us be promoters of peace, love, and Health and use these as vehicles to set ourselves FREE! Let our Passions move us, inspiration motivate us, and our dreams guide us into the Beautiful Future of Abundance for all. Lead me, guide me, direct and protect me, I'm in service for the Greater Good.

Note to Self... Don't forget to sit, watch, listen, taste, smell and Relax already! What's been done in done and can't be changed, stay in the moment and follow your bliss. Blow a kiss to this universe of magnificence and dwell in gratitude for all that it is. Don't be shy, be yourself, complete and whole because feeling great should be rewarded not punished, encouraged not shamed. When we can all open ourselves to the richness of love and radical self expression we will become ONE, full of Light, Laughter and Courage to be warriors, peaceful and gentle but confident and direct. I mean, sure, I could talk for hours and sound pretty smart but now its the actions that matter, walking the walk.

Note to Self... I'm Sorry and I love You

And on this path I will fall and get lost, but realize this is part of the journey, no need for criticism or alibis, its all part of learning. I say this now just to myself, "I'm sorry and I love you", I don't say this enough but I mean it. Its all part of healing, from bitter wounds to traumatic memories, sometimes forgiving ourselves is most important. Lets not stop or rewind but move forward into the eternal goodness, light in all directions but not blinding, darkness that protects but does not frighten.

Note to Self... Give yourself a Hug... and Don't forget to Breathe!

Post Fest Hindsight!

2007-10-24T19:33:00.000-07:00

So, after coming back to Lawrence, Ks and promoting a Green, new age, Vegan Festival in 4 weeks I haven't had much time to write or reflect till now since it has come and gone. Thankfully the weather was really great and to my surprise everything came together rather smoothly, the talent as far as teachers, speakers, and musicians were real quality; the downside was that barely anyone came!, disapointing, but what can you do but roll with it, detach from the financial reality and have faith that the money will come to pay the bills.... But as for the 50-70 people that did get to experience at least a little bit of Green Bliss 1, they had really inspiring and positive comments and thanks to give which made me smile a lot, not to mention two of my family members mention the words "proud of you" in the same sentence, those ones hit me in the heart.. but i'm staying optomistic about the possiblities of future events, workshops, and dinner parties helping to bring people together, educate, have fun and empower each other through inspiration, action and love!!! So ideas for the future include creative fundraising for our company Actions of Awareness in Lawrence and Kansas City the next couple of months, I'm really excited about making a veggie oil bus/van too, we'll see!. Bottom line is i feel good that i put my thoughts, dreams and ideas to the ultimate test and made them reality, practice, tangible so people could learn and participate with me walking the walk through meditation, yoga, dance, eating and cooking "peaceful food", and learning about alternative/underground and natural methods of healing and living. Tonight i got to sit in on a conversation by the author of a book The World Peace Diet, Will Tuttle very interesting, bringing up the corrolations between the way we treat our food (ie animal cruelty, domestication) and all of the problems of the world (ie violence, oppression, disease) and solutions for creating health, peace and love in our lives through a Vegan Diet. Yesterday I watched the movie 11th Hour, good and factual but a bit disheartening, i've been feeling overwhelmed by society today need some inspiration and smiles and laughs, listening to Mason Jennings is good for the heart! I'm wondering how i can continue to live my dreams and passions while sustaining myself and needs, i would like to live without money or minimalize the use of it because i feel money takes on the negative energy that most people have around it. and that goes in and out of our hands day to day which i'm not too fond of. . How do we all live in a world of abundance w/out money,meat or petroleum??? it is possible, i will find the way, Organic Gardening seems like the way forward, i want a food forest in my back yard, do YOU?? Peace, Love, Light and Laughter to all of those who read this....

HELP the "GREEN BLISS FEST" GROW!!

2007-09-20T11:16:00.000-07:00

Hi Friends and Family, I helping to plan a Holistic Festival on Health and Environment, we will have class on Yoga, Meditation, Dance, Qi Gong, Speakers on lifestyle, alternative medicine/healing, Vegan/Raw Diet, Indigo Children, Wisdom, Dreams ect.. we're looking for Teachers/Speakers/ and Volunteers to make the event ENLIGHTENING!!, check out www.myspace.com/greenblissfest for more info and contact us at (greenblissfest@gmail.com)

Spread My Wings

2007-09-05T20:36:00.000-07:00

Freedom to me is being confident and comfortable with who I am and where I'm at, its feeling open to self expression in anyway I see positive and of mutual benifit to those around me. Freedom is more than a word, more than creativity, it involves great responcibility, respect and growth. Its an essential condition for evolution of consciosness and society, in order for life to save itself from destruction we must empower ourselves to be free, free of hipocracy, government, guilt, greed, money, media, debt, embarrassment, regret, shame, addiction, religion, sex, and history... We must be the pioneers of the new world of discovery with unconditional acceptance, joy, and love for ourselves, each other and LIFE!, I yearn to be completely free, being the best I can see, do and feel. This is what I'm about and I want your help!

Burning Man, what a sober trip, with out the use of alcohol, pot, and psychadelics I survived a world of awe and chaos, creating my own experience which was anything but usual! Crazy, insane and madness can be words to describe this week long experiment of radical expression, reliance and community. But in the same breath words like Beauty, sacred and amazing also come to mind. A learning experience most definately, finding it hard to enjoy myself, letting go into the ocean of noice and dance proved challenging as did observing sexual anxiety and irrational guilt, shame and fear, trying to feel comfortable in nude company without judging or getting excited. Too much to do and see, sensory overload! I did make it an effort however to trace the green theme to its source, sitting in on many conversations and presentations from green economics, renewable energy, to activism, protest and community! all in all it showed me what remains hiden and suppressed in our everyday lives and how i want to understand my needs and feelings better to enjoy the fruits of life and celebration, and to help create space for freedom and expression at home, in society and beyond!!

Freedom Awaits!!

2007-08-25T17:23:00.000-07:00

I'm leaving the Valley and that makes me sad. But its important I move on... I don't want to cling but let go knowing I will learn and grow from this experience and the next, the unknown? I'm on my way to my first Burning Man festival, call me a virgin, I leave the park via Tahoe, Reno, destination Black Rock City. Packing up and shipping out, anxious and nervous, traveling light to make it easier I hope, but a challenge none the less. I feel a bit strange not sure why, having to remind self everything is alright and I'm doing my best! Trusting the universe that it will provide and nourish me along the journey home and beyond....

Moving on from a Dirtbag's Paradise

2007-08-25T17:19:00.000-07:00

I am Your Friend!

2007-08-19T17:04:00.000-07:00

I repeat, I am your Friend!, it is your choice to honor that or deny the fact that I am your friend. I will challenge you to become a better person, acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses, admire your beauty, creativity and divinity. But I refuse to agree with you on matters which conflict with my beliefs, values, and lifestyle. I will not ignore comments which make fun of or discriminate anyone or group, I will laugh with you but not at you. I will show you my faults through interactions in hopes that you will look inside self to find things you ignore, hesitate to change, things so simple but created through habit and fear. I will give you courage, support, and love, help you to realize your dreams by realizing mine! There is no time for distraction, please listen, unlock the doors inside mind that keep me out, remove the Armour around your heart that tears can't pierce. I will cry with you, grieve with you. I will show you my vulnerabilities, insecurities and doubts in hopes of breaking through obstacles that keep me from reaching goals. I will be honest, open and True, I will hold you, pick you up when you fall, but I will not let you hide, from me or society, I will be a reflection of your innocence and ignorance. I will push you beyond boundaries in time space and words, all I ask is that you do the same in Return. Together we are bigger than one, bigger than two, we are three with room to breathe, and as members of community it is our responsibility to be ourselves but continue to push the envelope, converse freely without judgment or hatred, see each person as part of us. We owe it to our Mother to cooperate as grown adults, to get egos under control and let spirit flow without attachment. Empowering individuals to serve the greater good. I am your friend, I see your potential, do you see mine?

Leading By Example

2007-08-11T10:22:00.000-07:00

..yesterday i wrote this in a fit of frustration, excitement, and inspiration,
"Guilt Trip"
Trying to be my best, although it sounds cheesy
trying to stay humble with out exploding, cause
sometimes i want to yell "what the fuck are you doing!"
you can fuck over yourself all you want, but others, the planet,
that's where the line is crossed.
Injustice has been ignore for too long and the oppressed are
seeking revenge. Its pretty obvious that the majority would
benefit greatly if the Greedy Powers at be would give up a
strangle hold on their egos, develop compassion for humanity,
or make it easy on all of us and commit suicide.
Although we shouldn't revert to violence, that's using poison
instead of medicine, but a cure for this disease could hurt the
Economy, and 'Oh my God' how would the West survive
without a TV in front of their face and a beer in their hand?
Are we better off waiting for the pot to boil, killing us all?
Maybe we should all wake up and quit our jobs, go back to
growing vegetables and building houses of straw and mud.
Some people think there are less radical solutions to our
problems but time is getting on. Our Mother's got cancer
and we still can't stop Raping her.
What am i doing to heal these wounds? just what is necessary:
trying my best to use less and help more, walk or bike instead
of drive, pick up litter when i see it, shop locally and cook more,
Think before i Eat!, ask myself these questions daily without
getting too satisfied with the answers. You can say I'm extreme,
point out my flaws but pointing the finger does you no good at all
Take responsibility for your actions, surprise me, challenge
my ideals and encourage me when I'm down, 'cause even when I
appear confident I have insecurities too. Can we stop embarrassing
each other and give compliments instead? It stretches my
imagination but I dream of abundance for EVERYONE, the potential
is their but our tactics make me sick! I'll swallow my pride for
equality, can you do that? Sometimes I think playing Sane is
holding me back. That's when I decided, "I'll Guilt Trip you too,
if that's what it Takes!"

Pledge of Resistance!

2007-08-07T16:51:00.001-07:00

Sometime ago when in New Zealand i came across Saul Williams, a spoken word poet and personal hero, version of the Pledge of Resistance on youtube.com, it was so inspiring that i made sure to get online and watch it everytime i felt i was lacking motivation, there are many inspiring people, speeches, documentaries out there, this is from www.notinourname.net ,may we all band together in our own Pledge of Resistance,which starts with where we choose to spend our money and who we elect to govern us.

"Pledge of Resistance"

We believe that as people living
in the United States it is our
responsibility to resist the injustices
done by our government,
in our names

Not in our name
will you wage endless war
there can be no more deaths
no more transfusions
of blood for oil

Not in our name
will you invade countries
bomb civilians, kill more children
letting history take its course
over the graves of the nameless

Not in our name
will you erode the very freedoms
you have claimed to fight for

Not by our hands
will we supply weapons and funding
for the annihilation of families
on foreign soil

Not by our mouths
will we let fear silence us

Not by our hearts
will we allow whole peoples
or countries to be deemed evil

Not by our will
and Not in our name

We pledge resistance

We pledge alliance with those
who have come under attack
for voicing opposition to the war
or for their religion or ethnicity

We pledge to make common cause
with the people of the world
to bring about justice,
freedom and peace

Another world is possible
and we pledge to make it real.

Yosemite at Last!

2007-08-07T15:41:00.000-07:00

Driving back to the Valley through darkness watching the headlights pass between trees, walking up to the Terrace Kitchen and knowing "I'm HOME", wow, seeing so many shining familiar faces is amazing and also overwhelming. I've been bouldering, swiming, craging, and multipitch climbing in Toulumme, we had a pseudo "Thanksgiving Dinner" last night followed w/ "Shirtless 07" kitchen dance party, summer series #2 push up competion, which i won i might add, the a cold/hot shower followed by sound sleep on a real bed w/ a pillow! ahhhh, the luxuries....mmmmm..good!, i'm fitting into the Valley Life alright keeping my 'Free-gan' ethics and refusing beer and smoking, amongst trying to squeeze in yoga, meditation, reading and writing. Life is good, i'm looking for work but want to do something enviromentaly sound, might just end up collecting beer bottles and cans for 5cents a pop!, other than that, trying to keep up on some internet research, waiting for more opportunities to fall my way, and gearing up for the BURN!

Bbbback in the USSA!!

2007-08-02T21:37:00.000-07:00

Correct amundo, I've landed, in San Fran City tonight couchsurfing down at Haight and Ashbury, my first truly San Fran experience I must say, its been a mind boggling few days between hitching and flying, traveling back in time with little sleep no less.. I'm trying to adjust to my new and seeming 'foreign' surroundings without being too judgemental or compromising my values that I've worked so hard to build while abroad, i know that i have big ideas for my future and I'm preparing to make them blossom by getting my hands dirty and working hard. i look forward to seeing everyone again and seizing new opportunities!!

Yeppoon

2007-07-24T07:01:00.000-07:00

So i made it across the 'Great Ditch' to Aus that is, flew into Sydney w/ my friend Sammy, we camped under cliffs at the famous Bondi Beach then got the hell out of town, we've been hitching up the east coast steadily settling at a couple friend's to relax along the way. Tonight we are in the town of Yeppoon, the first town across the Tropic of Capricorn, a land of pretty beaches, coconuts and crocks, atleast i hear? anywho, i'm excited about coming back to the states on Aug 2nd but torn about leaving this country, its been a blast, i'm exhausted from non-stop "hurry up and relax antics" and soon we'll be snorkeling in the Great Barrier Reef! SWEET!!, Hasta Luegoooo...

Leaving New Zealand!

2007-06-17T15:47:00.000-07:00

The Time has come, i am preparing departure from this island at a frantic pace while trying to remain calm and open to change and opportunity like last night standing in the cold for over an hour, tired and guilty full off of greasy potatoe wedges, waiting for just the right ride .. . a young couple driving home from a 5day kayak excursion to christchurch, my 5hr destination, conversation was great and they even let me sleep, which was awesome, arriving at midnight they invited me to stay over, they live in a community house in the city w/ an sweet garden and 3 chickens in the back yard!, this morning i'm meeting some friends for breakfast, can't wait, from here i go south to land unseen for a few days and then to Aus. i fly a way, migrating from winter to summer, exciting looking forward to change in scenery, keep it real!!

The Community Lifestyle!

2007-05-30T23:08:00.000-07:00

Wow, living in a community of 40-50 people is great!, and hard! most of the time people are tired, their feet stink and most likely have bad breath, but having 3meals a day w/ 5 good friends is awesome and i love it, but adapting to people leaving and new peps arriving is a bit overwhelming and a challenge to keep cool and maintain balance... I've been working and wwoofing(volunteer) for about 3 weeks at one of the neatest and as far as i know, most successful communities in new zealand, by successful i mean its been around 23 years, people still talk to each other and the buildings aren't all falling apart. i've realize living in a community is an idealistic dream but really dificult, but in a good way, it pushes everyone out of their comfort zome a bit forcing them to grow, compromise or leave!, sometimes that's the way its got to be. well i was a bit sick, sad and lonely yesterday and this morning but when i looked out over the ocean and heard a few jokes from my 60+ year old boss, i couldn't help but smile, laugh and give in to the goodness. i hope all of you, my friends and family keep searching for what makes you happy and keep that close to you so when things don't seem to be going your way you'll have loads to brigthen your day! Peace LOVE, and LOoonG HUGS! i plan on being back in YOSEMITE in at the BEggining of AUGUST!, can't wait!!

Winding Down and Walking Long!

2007-05-10T03:01:00.000-07:00

So, my New Zealand excursion is finally winding down, I'm starting to see the light at the end of this journey through time, mind and NOW! whatever that means? I just got off an amazing treck that took four days and we covered 90+Kilometers!!(that's like 60mi!!) cool beans and sweet potatoes, i'm stoked, seeing as it the longest hiking charade i've ever accomplished. it was fun, enlightening(well not quite), a bit wet but mostly B-E-A-utiful! I'm now spending the night at one of the coolest Backpackers every imagined, art from floor to ceiling, their own alt. radio station and a bunch of kick ass cats, literally. Well my next 'mish' lies ahead and involves the dreaded four letter word 'WORK', i know i hate to say it but its true i must, funds are disappearing faster than i can manifest them and i have no plane ticket home as of yet, and I miss America, damn it, i didn't think i'd ever say it but its da truf, and da truth hurts, not really it feels pretty good to miss the fam. and friends knowing we will be together in due time whether in Cali or Kansas. I love you ALL peace, shits and giggles!!!

Another Wonderful Day In the Neighborhood!

2007-04-05T15:42:00.000-07:00

So, a bit of a strange story.. I was drivin with a friend the other day and we got side-swiped by the crazyman drivin a flash car, he gave us $2,000 cash for the damages, and the car's only worth $900, we were all fine, and super stoked, i also quit my job as an applepicker and me and my new girlfriend moved in together, meanwhile, i'm broke, she's pregnant and i'm flying HOME!!............. ...........April FOols!!, i couln't help myself, harmless fun right!!!, knock on wood (knock knock)

I hope you all are enjoying yourselves in whatever pursuits you are engaged in. Happy Easter for those who celebrate!, i plan on going on a Easter scavenge of my own this weekend.. I figured i'd give i bit of an update of the last two months here in new Zealand via a few excerpts from my daily journal:

12 March 2007
"Return to Balance"
Sitting on top of broken rocks, smiling at the soft sea breeze waiting..
for time to still, watching with open eyes at no surprise, patient, calm
surrendering to Dhamma Law, mind to nature
the fog casts hazy shadows of ignorance across valleys, boundaries, and planets,
a veil of missery plaguing existence, blocking out the light of happiness, love, and peace.
Silently, observing myself strapped in the shackles of history,
i sit on top mountains of pain and drink rivers of presence, reminding self of change.
Everything comes and goes as this veil will fade and disappear,
this body will grow old wither and die. The I remains as part of LIFE...

But what is Life? I ask myself and what am I? sitting on this weathered bench peering off
into the vastness of the ocean exploring through human consciousness.
I've been told about birth and death and may have experienced both a few thousand times before, see.. some say LIFE lies in between but few are sure where it start and stops.
But I'm not too keen on stories ending so I tend to choose ones without beginnings.
For Now and Then are times demands, but what is time but a bunch of Clocks?
I prefer to see things circular, complete and whole with no cracks to fill or
gaps to bridge with tools that don't fulfill the job.
So I ask, When will the building stop? so we can get on with this thing called living...
'Cause words can say a lot but often distract me from doing.
For what else are these bodies for, minds and spirits should need no words.
I yearn to enjoy every moment with no attachment to pain or pleasure,
all feelings should be worth experiencing equanimosly throughout the body.
No part should be left untouched by Mother's wind or Father's light, sun and air are other names, but names don't matter in this game called LIFE.
and it may be the shortest or longest thing I'll ever know,
but I'm determined to get the most out of my time on earth and in this body,
searching for health and balance, while enjoying the show.

Some describe this ride as a rollercoaster with highs and lows, sometimes completely upsidedown, I can agree from experience as it all remains exciting right?
However fast or slow, scary or fun everything seems to level out eventually,
and the neat part I've figured out is that we make our own ride of sorts.
Controlling the pace and size of bumps, attracting those things we need and want,
sometimes without even knowing or realizing what's been done,
may we all resume control of our own lives bringing ourselves back to earth feet first,
grounding ourselves in our environment choosing surroundings of loving friends,
deciding what we really want and pursuing it with all our being
whether it be happiness or sweet success, love or lust, let it be reflected in the seeds we sow,
and may all our simple acts of kindness and compassion be united
helping this place "return to balance"

14 March
I am 21 years old now, its been about two weeks and 10 days of meditation later, the habits of life remain although my mind tries to remain objective, observing actions, feelings and thoughts. This is supposed to be 'Operation Purification' and part of it is and part of it feels the same as it usually does, on the move adapting to new people, new vibes, and new routine or lack there of. I've made it to the rainbow gathering at last!! It's nice, not quite what I expected but "se la vi" (so is life). Its very rough and tumble out here, very little organization (rainbow style) capital, and sometimes motivation. But its a learning experience for sure. I'm trying to integrate what i've learned the last two weeks form Goenkji, Dhamma, and myself. It was such an amazing experience being at Vipassana, its exactly what I needed. A lot happened physically, mentally, and emotionally in those 10days. I pushed myself further than i probably ever have. The rewards were incredible too, finally getting used to waking up at 4:15am, sitting for 10-11 hours/day, and eating my last meal before noon, and controlling my cravings and fears! I think food is my biggest physical craving ,which I'm still having a hard time with here, and my own body and sexuality is probably my biggest fear. It presented itself yesterday when we all got naked and danced in the rain, i observed my feelings and they went, for the most part. What can i do but unconditionally love myself just the way I am? I think i could write for hours about Vipassana but not right now...

19 March
This morning is Beautiful, surrounded in good company enjoying the sun and open skies. I woke in the teepee, lying on the ground bare, covered in fur and blanket, it was a windy night chilly-cool, to rise up for a wee was quite the "mish" My dreams digested Sruti's wisdom and Dharma talks, conscious minds spread information like 'marmite' on toast. I am grateful to be here nourished by this mornings porridge, what a treat indeed, living in the woods, a temporary community without electricity...

29 March
This evening we went down the mountain in the caravan with a full load i must say, we went to this Tui community where a storyteller was telling stories. We arrived a little late but blended in with ears perked. He was a nice fellow looked as if he had ancestors from many places, he talked of the ancient Maori and native past, warriors and mothers, rivers, stone, and rays of the sun. It was very interesting especially understanding a bit of forgotten tongue that our ancestors used. >< At the Tui Tree House, i did a bit of monkeying around climbing from floor to ceiling and swinging from the rafters pausing to slip me feet into the magical clogs...

On the ride home i was listening to two guys discussing beliefs as if they were two pigeons fighting over crumbs. What's the point in arguing one's opinion without trying to learn. Creating tension between friends working for the same cause. We all want love and light in our lives but we are all searching and finding in way different ways and that's OK with me, just human variety right? A path for every personality, simple as that. And trying to be more right is just falling in a trap. Its living through the ego not from the heart. Oh well, everything will work out, or at least I hope it will, you may not and I don't care, let us just enjoy our time together and the peace we share...

5 April
I feel myself changing with the seasons, inspired by a full moon but trying not to be overwhelmed by my own imagination. Its important for me to be humble in these fragile times of revolution and oppression. I ask myself today, what am I running from? afraid of? What are my insecurities? Part of me is running from responsibility afraid to settle down or do any one thing for anytime at all. The idea of work scares me, if only i could lay in this sun all day supporting a lifestyle of dreaming. I'm sure I'll find what I need to find when the time is right I'll get a job and make some bank, then maybe wonder off to another place...

Funby and Beyond!!!

2007-02-21T13:45:00.000-08:00

For those who don't know, I usually carry a journal with me that i like to write in, and every now and then something creative comes out of me and on to the page, its a style i consider 'train of thought' or 'spoken word' i think its best heard out loud performed by me, but i didn't start with that intention at all it was just for me to vent and entertain myself, sometimes i would read bits to friends, but i've started to write things that i enjoy performing and have intended for an audience, i guess, so if you dare: read below and tell me what you think? Thanks, Brady K, aka 'FUNBY'

"A Taste of Utopia" by 'FUNBY' February 11, 2007

Have I told you about this place that I go to sometimes?
Dude, it’s like a taste of Utopia. I’m not talking about pudding either.
It’s like a slice of heaven where everyone is happy and jolly, sometimes naked.
Yeah, it’s like a pie that’s got flavors for everyone,
Some like it spicy, some like it sweet,
if it’s got chocolate or candy in it, it speaks out to me,
But in all reality, it’s got nearly everything that you need
to blossom and grow into the person you dream of becoming,
the one that saves the world or speaks their heart,
the one that navigates dark spaces when shit’s hard to find,
they illuminate everything and make everything all right.
Some are masters and pranksters, some authors and lovers.
The point is, this place I’m talking about is like a river of inspiration where I go to swim,
It’s like a room full of clouds where I can rest my head.
The people that roam there wear costumes and play games,
they awaken the kids that we all are inside.
And their knowledge and interests go on and are endless,
These people build spiral temples that seem to stretch to infinity,
they make time disappear and throw rainbows into the sky.
Some of them walk on stilts and blow fire, but others are healers I tell ya.

They’re so kind, friendly, and generous.
They are the strangers that you just want to kiss,
But there are no strangers there, just people you haven’t met yet.
This place, it’s magical, it’s a trip down the rabbit hole,
you’re not sure how you got there, but you’re glad you did.
These people, I don’t know if they’re humans, aliens, or animals,
But they’re on to it, I tell ya.
They are so accepting and loving, like one big family that’s real accepting and loving because I know that not all are.

This place is so comfortable that everyone can be themselves or just pretend to be someone else ‘cause it’s all in fun at the end of the day, even when you don’t get laid, you’re out of money, or in the rain.
It’s a place I go to learn, but it’s not in a classroom – that’s the cool part.
It’s just some chill people hangin’ out, some doin’ drugs,
others just cruising around embracing the love.
There’s no judgment there, just warm smiles, bright eyes, open hearts, and great big hugs.
You may ask, “is this place over the rainbow and through the woods, is it all make believe or something you dreamed of?”

No, it’s a real place I say, on a planet called earth and it could be in your backyard if you wanted it to.
And all it takes is a call to some friends who have a vision for the future, this world and themselves, who can come together to enjoy others and promote peace.
I tell you, it’s time to put the word out on the street, let your voice be heard and afterwards stand in silence with keen ears soaking up the moment between your idea and theirs.
It is the time that we all encourage each other to dream and change for the better of humanity, not just me.
Let’s be creative and free ourselves from tradition. Let us all lead by example to create a culture we can be proud of and a society that cares, let us all hold hands as we unfuck the world.
Let’s reform the system that we helped to build and create a community that future generations can enjoy too.
Yeah, this place that I speak of, there are places like it everywhere.
The sad part is they don’t often know about each other.
It’s a taste of Utopia, it’s a place of transition between now and forever.
The cool part is that we mend the gap.
And if you want, I can take you there or we can make our own.
Think about it and let me know, okay?

Hitching to Wellington!

2006-12-20T14:41:00.000-08:00

Ahh, isn't life greeeat? Well, i'm now in Wellington, the Nation's capital after hiking some 5-6 hours here, i started off yesturday after noon, got my first ride from a nice engineer from S.Africa, he took me to Napier, we had a great time chatting about music and poetry ect.. i put him on to a few inspirations of my and he showed me some of his, it was rad, as i got dropped in napier i was parched, so i went to the nearest "Fish and chips" and bought the greasiest $5 special i've every had, it was O-kay?, from there, i thought, hey migth as well keep goin, it was about 8pm, i got a short ride to hastings by a young kid Alby as i was walkin that way, he dropped me in the middle of town and i back tracked to the highway not wanting to set up yet and i still had a bit of day light, a couple kids gave me a ride to the highway from there i walked a couple km's to the juntion of the highway w/ my tumb out a van pulled over after the round about, a "jointer" cabinet maker, from Palmer's North, he was visiting his mom in the hospital and picked me up for a ride to his house about an hour and a half from my first destination, here. he offered to have me stay at his house for the night, what a guy!

Two weeks till Christmas!

2006-12-11T21:02:00.000-08:00

So the holiday season is pretty much here, its just a bit different down here in NZ because well for starters.. its SUMMER! yes a bit different from the cold and sometimes snowy holidays of the states but I'm looking forward to Christmas on the beach or where ever it may be.
So I've been in the town of Rotorua for about a week now, its a pretty cool town about the middle of the north island. Its got a lot of native culture and some crazy geo-termal stuff, loads of hot springs. On the front page of the paper today was a story about one of the giesers in town spewing boiling mud 60 feet high! In other news, I am staying with a really sweet family who I'm wwoofing for in exchange for the BodyTalk course I took two weeks ago. The Mom of the house, Tracy, has been a BodyTalk instructor and practitioner since it began about 10 years ago. Its a really neat and holistic system of healing, creating balance within the body by linking up different parts and systems by relative priority, to create better communication between them. It does this using a simple muscle test to ask the body, or the subconscious mind Yes/NO questions, and has a nifty protocal to pinpoint what needs help in a short amount of time, a session usually only lasts between 5-20 minutes. It can pretty much get to the root of any problem that the body/mind can have and gets the energy moving right. It was a really sweet experience to take part in the course and Tracy is a really amazing and inspiring woman, having studied a variety of osteopathy and healing systems for the last 25 years. She is supper passionate about bodyTalk and says that everyone can benifit from it and everyone should practice it. And the cool part is that its really simple too, and almost anyone can learn parts of the system to use on themselves and their family, its toatally safe and can really only benifit the patient! check out the website www.bodytalksystem.com if your interested.
So other than that I've been doing a lot of weeding and running around taking the kids to school and such to help out around the house, I've also happened upon some really cool information. I'm reading a book right now by Deepak Chopra, one of the great minds of our time, called Ageless Body, Timeless Mind. Its a really great book about healing yourself and creating overall health with thoughts and intentions, he explains a lot about quantum theory and its super easy to understand. I also got the chance to watch a lecture by a guy named Bruce Lipton, PhD, called The NEw Biology, he goes in depth to the biology of thought and intention as well and creates a pretty comprehensive idea of what is involved in creating and keeping a healthy body. Well I'm afraid this entry is a little dry of exciting and colorful details, but none the less I'm having an amazing time here, I'm learning a ton, and I'm meeting some absolutely fascinating people! I'd really like to here from all of those reading this, and I hope you all have wonderful and love filled holidays! or just plain ole days too!!

It's time I use this thing called a blog.

2006-11-19T23:08:00.000-08:00

I been in the country for just over a month now, I'm finally growing comfortable with my wonderful surroundings, thus creating a more intimate experience. This is good and bad, the bad is that I'm having to smack myself from time to time saying, " your in new zealand, why aren't you smiling!"; I've also spent the last three weeks in the same place, which i told myself I wouldn't do. The good is that I the place I've spent the last three weeks is incredible, I'm learning a lot about myself and truly getting to know the great people that make this place so wonderful and unique. I'm drawing wisdom out of the elders and passion from the wwoofers, even drinking beer around the bonfire with the locals, I'm learning to fit in.

The other day I went over to Bill and Donna's house. Donna is the manager here at Mana, Bill is her husband, a 67 year old retired business consultant, who envited me to participate in his weekly radio show that he prerecords and sends to a radio station near his home in Vermont. My homework was to pick six songs that have influenced my life. We played the songs and then discussed what their personal significance and "Father William's", Bill's radio personality, response to the music. I chose some contemporary songs that make me happy and fill my heart with love, it was a special time we had together in his office listening to the songs, nearly two generations between us. I don't think Bill had heard of any of the songs I picked out, mostly because they were local artists, but his response to the music was great! We laughed and immersed ourselves in the moment with a really passionate conversation. It one those conversations that you'll remember for a long, long time. We talked about the music that opened his mind and heart, Simon & Garfunkel, and Leonard Cohen, while I could hardly put my inspiration into words, that energy that flowed through me that morning was something really special, it was a natural high that you don't get everyday. Bill is a very wise man, I enjoy his comments and stories very much.

So I've been thinking a lot this last month about what life is all about. A constant dialog within my mind and with the people I encounter. Trying to decide what makes me most happy, healthy and kind. I'm searching for knowledge, and wisdom, thinking that the answers are "out there" for me to trip over. I've also been trying to look inward and to untangle my mind and draw out my inner wisdom, with meditation I'm trying to connect my energy to the global energy. I hope I can relate deeply to everyone I know and will encounter in the future, and I believe we can create a more beautiful, loving, and sustainable future!

Searching

2006-11-02T20:35:00.000-08:00

So I quite college to go to New Zealand for a year. It sounded like a good idea, I came with two good buddies, a couple thousand dollars in the bank, 40 pounds on my back and some strong motivation, and a growing hunger for the exploration of new knowledge and experiences. So far I haven't been disappointed but I have definately been awestruck, rained on and intrigued. This is my journey to the other side of the globe...